Mexicans are funny…

Written 8/11/06

So, I was walking down the street one night about a week ago on my way to meet friends to go out when a couple stopped me and asked me for the time. I didn’t know how to tell people the time yet so I just showed them my watch. (that’s another thing I have noticed, Mexicans don’t wear watches. I can’t figure out why because someone is always selling watches somewhere. Maybe it’s just part of the general disregard for being on time.) Anyway, the next thing I know guy has me sitting on bench engaged in conversation about his girlfriend’s sexual preferences. And she was sitting right beside me! This was half in English and half in Spanish. So he goes on to ask me if I have brother because it is his girlfriend’s dream to have a black boyfriend because, as everyone knows, black men HAVE to be oh so well endowed. I was in complete shock. I mean who does that! So imagine me sitting there, in the middle of a park, on a bench between two strangers talking about sexual preferences of a man’s girlfriend right in front of her. And they were serious! I considered attempting setting them straight about stereotypes, but I was late meeting my friends and definitely couldn’t do it in Spanish. I think they wanted to go clubbing with me, but we were going to a gay club and I didn’t know how they would feel about that. Besides, after that conversation it definitely would have been weird. So I made up some excuse about having to go someplace else first blah blah blah. Crazy right? I don’t think Japan could top that. LOL

OH! So then a few days ago I was walking down the street on my way to the bank to do something for my visa. This guys walks past me turns around and walks with me and says hi, asks if I speak English. I roll my eyes and say yes. I knew this wasn’t going to be fun. So he’s talking to me, he speaks English really well but definitely like he’s from the hood somewhere in the US. Interesting right? So I entertain him for a few minutes. He tells me he’s from St. Louis and “born and raised in the hood.” OK, so far so good. So then I was like why are you here in Mexico and more importantly why are you here trying to sell me handmade bracelets. Come to find out, he got deported for having something to do with the Black Panthers (so he said). According to him the government didn’t like what he was doing. This seemed a bit far fetched since her couldn’t have been older than 30 and had told me his whole life story and how his “baby mama” was still back in the States with his baby and was getting married to some other man. So a little crazy but not that bad right? Well wait for it. So THEN, he starts telling me about how he has studied all these different religions including voodoo and Rastafarianism and then he points to this drawing of an alien on his paper and looks to the sky. He says to me, “I have been there you know. I have left this physical realm in an alien spaceship. I have seen things. I know things the government doesn’t want me to know, about their mind controlling devices and everything.” No lie, straight-faced. RUN AWAY right? Right. So he asks me for my number and I’m like HEELL NO, and start backing away slowly making sure this crazy man is not following me.